Oct 1, 2012

Where am I?

When life comes to a halt, and you don’t know where you are going! You know nothing, you don’t even know yourself anymore. You are not the same person, you don’t have the same beliefs, you don’t speak the same language, and you don’t do the same things you used to do. You are just watching the time, watching your days go by, day after day, and you still can do nothing about it. You feel like there is a glass barrier insulating you from your life; you can’t interact, you can’t scream, you can’t even explode, you can’t fight – but what are you going to fight for? Or fight what? And you simply discover you don’t have any powers, or do I have it but I’m not using it anymore? You discover you don’t even have a voice! Where is my voice? Then you hit a rock bottom to find no will to do anything about it. Really? No will? Have you gone that low? That bad? Where is me? Where am I? what is this feeling? What are these feelings? How do you call this, when you are watching your life collapsing into bits and you are not doing anything about it. Years passed and you are just watching, like an alien. An alien to your life!
Sometimes you think it’s not worth it. Sometimes you think it’s not the life you ordered. Sometimes you feel like you died some time ago, and you are just a wandering soul watching your life continues as if that particular accident happened, that accident when ur soul decided to divorce ur body.. and you can’t do anything about it, and you can’t even remember what happened when you died. All you think of is that you don’t belong to this place, in fact, to any place!